Dispelling the Myth of Cause and Effect in Relationships

How often do you hear the words ‘She/He did this and I felt….’?  It implies that a person feels a certain way because of someone else’s actions.  What if this was a myth?  What if these simplistic explanations merely trivialise the human experience, reducing understanding of ourselves and our worlds to cause and effect relationships?

I recently saw someone tenaciously hold to their story that a person’s actions resulted in them feeling very angry and upset. Despite much discussion, the person struggled to see things differently.  It was not until they considered that it was not the ‘person’ who caused them upset, but their own anger at continually attracting this type of interaction into their life, that they were able to see what was really going on.

Where in your life are you denying responsibility for your actions by blaming others for how you feel or act?

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